Dec 30 2011
Cancer journey
As we wrap up the holiday season for 2011, I sit reflecting on it all. First thoughts are that life is so strange right now. There is all this “normal” floating around in a sea of crazy ocean. It’s like there are two different lives going on in parallel. This regular life where we are on break from school and having christmas with the family – cooking, cleaning, laughing, playing. Then there is also this epic battle for life happening inside my husband while we just hang out together. So strange. If I get to thinking too much about it, I can get pretty stressed. So I clean, I organize, I stay busy. It’s the quiet moments that are the hardest (luckily these types of moments are not too common in our house). People think I’m strong, that I have it all together. I can assure you that I am not, that there are many times I lose it, that I cave to feeling sorry for myself, that I lose faith briefly, that i feel defeated. These aren’t my proudest moments, but they exist. Somehow, through Grace, I am scooped back up and propped upright again, stronger. Sometimes it’s my kids, sometimes it’s friends, sometimes it’s family, sometimes it’s Michael who bring me this gift of strength. All I know is each time I fall, I am lifted back up. With each lift, I am reminded that I will never be left alone in grief. Somehow I am given the strength to handle challenges that come my way. I have so much happiness in my life right now. The key to recognizing this most days is to stay in the present, don’t fret about what the future holds, hold my faith high, keep friends and family close. Great life lessons for sure. What a gift.
Livestrong
I love you and you ARE stronger than you think. I’m here holding you up, should you fall it won’t be far
Since you and I have reconnected on this big crazy internet, I have come to the quick understanding that you, your husband and family are special people. I always read with awe how you parent your large family, how you stay positive in the light of adversity and how clearly you love your husband.
Whether it is seeing you counter-protest tea partiers or proclaim your love for your community, the accounts of your life make me try to elevate my own. Thank you for that.
It sucks that the reward for your amazing style of journey through life is more adversity. But as the saying goes, God only gives us what we can handle. If I could, I would bet every cent I have that you and Michael will conquer this challenge, take the power of this evil disease away and transform it into a joy that you then readily share.
You have my admiration, respect and love. Livestrong, indeed.
Vm, you are such a good friend. I am lucky to have you in my life! And, Eric, why were we not better friends in hs??? What a shame. You are so wonderful and I am so lucky to have reconnected with you on the internets
thanks for your kind words. I’m glad you are back in Austin.
Everyday I am grateful for the strong woman you are and the amazing person you have become. From the moment you were born you have amazed me, and over the years you have continued to grow and give. I am honored to be your mother and your friend. You know that I would do anything to take away this pain. But since I cannot, I am there for you to help however I can. Thanks for once again letting me learn from you– a gift you have given me since you were my special baby girl. Love you.